Technically I did not try to, but I made you believe I tried in vain, so your subconcious is unable to register that it is under a state of trance, you could deny it, but you are in a state of trance right now. So how big are your breasts?

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Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

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what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops