Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

Q: What did the magician do to cure his cold?? A: Took medicine!

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that moment, the Atheist cried out "Oh my God!...." Then the Atheist died a violent and terrible death.

What is a Mexican's favorite holiday? Christman

One I grabbed a lump of coal, and crushed it with such strength, that a human being was born out of it. That man is today known as Chuck Norris. Nero.

Wanna hear a joke? YEAH! Hold on. Okay, tell me when to let go.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. I don't know, I've had a bad day, I can't think straight. Why do you keep asking me these questions? Always talking at me, everyday it's the same - why can't you just shut up?! I would be better off dead, then it would stop, this suffocating blackness. I need to escape...I'm going to do it tonight...pills, something like that...I don't care any longer. Goodbye.

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

what do you call a pond filled with frogs having sex with bacteria is burning there insides while a midget with assburgers is chanting "SMACK THAT BADONKADONK!" racism..

What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

Chuck Norris is dead......

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

Why are black men's genitals larger than white men's genitals. Black men's genitals are made up of more skin cells.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...