What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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general tso's broccoli

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops