Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

A narwhall walks into a store and asks the cashier where he keeps the soap products. The cashier does not speak english.

What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

How did the baby cross the road? .......... It was stapled to the chicken.

What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

dassa

What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was just a young boy living in a quaint suburbial town, his family, 1 2 3 4 and 5 were all killed by 7. 7 then burned down their house while 6 ran away from the blazing inferno he used to call home. 6 was forced to live off the land in order to survive. 6 built a house using only mud and sticks and a little elbow grease. When 7 heard the news that 6 was still alive and well in the forest, 7 went into the woods, tracked down 6's home and again burned it down. When 6 came back from a day of fishing and a handfull of fish, he saw that his house was burned down. The fish then escaped from his hands, and flew away. 7 had left a note on the ground that said 7. 6 then recalled the first time 7 had killed his family and burned down house. 7 had now burned down two of 6's houses. That is why 6 is afraid of 7.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Dave then complied, opened the door and let the police search his house. He was then found innocent of drug related charges.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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