Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

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Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

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How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap until there parents come home.

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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What did the goat say to the zebra? Nothing. Goats can't speak

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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womens rights

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops