your mothers so fat...... shes borderline diabetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between katchup and musterd A very long list of things that I don't want to read

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Just Replying to Brock Facebook request Brock you should know by now that i am at your school talk to me there. Plus i loved the kiss you gave me in science. Now that tested my chemistry. Hehe. Emma Brown xOxOxOxXXXXXoOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -31

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

The man was driving down the road at an opropriat speed and got t-boned. The women in the other car got out and tried to help the man but the man was already out of the car and call 911

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

thumb_up thumb_down -31

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Nig gers Jews Bean ers and fa ggots and everyones grandma that died recently, F u c k you there all burning in Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what is the diference between a jew and a boy scout. a boy scout comes home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

civil rights

thumb_up thumb_down -33

You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops