What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

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What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Why was the little boy crying? Well first off he is adopted. He then woke up and found out his pop star dad is dead. ..... His name is blinket.

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what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

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The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think the second man would have seen it. Made by Bobbie Pummel

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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There was a 4-car accident in Mexico today. 87 people died.

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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Why was six afraid of seven? He was wanted for murder.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt, its just a myth

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Greg and Michal once had a fight I lost.

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Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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