Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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balls

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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Where's my baby??

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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What's the difference between a brick and Ricky? A brick gets laid and has a higher iq

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man." The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Q: What's so special about my Ferrari? A: It was painted with babies

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

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what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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