A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Poop!!

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Why did the boy fail his math test? Because his Mother threw a refrigerator at him.

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hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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Your face

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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A boy walk in. What did you think I was gonna add "into a bar"? Also, boys under the age of 21 aren't allowed to drink.

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Q: Why doesn't the Mexican belong in St. Louis? A: Because he ran away from home, his family lives in Kansas City.

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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