Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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CAS

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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I will create more jobs for americans

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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Whats brown a sticky, shit

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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