What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

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Who's worse: Ghandi or Hitler Answer: Hitler

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Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

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Women's rights.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

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Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops