i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

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all jokes aside...

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A man walks into a bar... he is blind so it isn't funny

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

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how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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Why did the terminal cancer patient die? Because he fell of the stairs with his wheelchair.

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Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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