If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What did the heart attack victim say? Call 911, I'm having chest pains. yeah, your anti-jokes are this funny....

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I can count to potato.

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

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What did the farmer say when he couldnt find his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

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Why does history repeat itself? Because no one listened to it the first time.

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roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

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Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

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Q: Why did the little boy have freckles? A: Heredity

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Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

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A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

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What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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