- Anti Joke

What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

Patty cake. Which was a pretty funny catchthingie.

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke