Knock knock. Who's there? Heisenberg...

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what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

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Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

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rosie o'donald goes on a diet

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

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Why do vampire's from 'Twilight' sparkle? Because it's a really bad movie.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

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What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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a chicken walks into terry's house he penetrates himn

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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ugh good riddance

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What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

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An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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