Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Q: What is black, white and red all over? A: Interracial sex during the time which the bible has decreed as abhoration.

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Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops