what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

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I called this hot girl up from class one day. She told me to come over because no one was home. I got to her house, and no one was home.

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James' father died from being overweight. The next day in the mail, James received a coupon for Skinny's garcinia cambogia pills to help him lost weight. Simply put, it was not a good day for James.

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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i like having monkeys lick peanut butter off my nipples

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whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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no

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

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What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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The Female Orgasm

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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