The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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Hey! Where is my tracker?

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Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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Why did Ian pass his CRB check? Because he committed his crimes on holiday

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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