What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

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Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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My kids are mistakes.

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

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What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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