What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

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slaughter the mussies #EDL

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Poop!!

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Why did the penguin die? He was anti-social and would rather die than huddle. So he died. THE END

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

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a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

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Your momma's so fat that when she looked in the mirror she broke down crying and threw up in the toilet because she is belemic.

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What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

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Lets go Yankees

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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purple pickles

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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