So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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7

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

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What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

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ring around the rosie ... your dead

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

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What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

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Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

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whats worse than gill? nothing

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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What's worse than stepping on a Lego? Leukemia

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Q. What do you call 2 black men on a bike? A. Organised Crime

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Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

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SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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