What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

The WNBA

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

Hello

Get off my porch.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

Why did the chicken cross the road?

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

Sac

Yes!

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

I was Writing and i broke my pencil

Religion.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

A Cow Walk's Into A Bar And Say's Drink Please The Bartender Is Then Sent To A Mental Hospital For Talking To A Cow.

what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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