Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

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How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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YO FACE

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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What do you call a person mowing a lawn? A Mexican

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What was the energizer bunny arrested for? Rape.

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OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops