What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

whats purple and savage? Barney!

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

How many Pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1. and "pollack" is a derogatory term that could be fond offensive to some people.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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