What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Bill: Whats 2 + 2? Joe: Your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Twenty-Four

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +39

the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

It is so hard to write an antijoke.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops