what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

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A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

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whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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I LIKE TRAINS

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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What happened to the starving african kid? He died

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

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What do you call an Oliver with friends? A dream

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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