What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

hihihihihihihihihihiihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihjhihhhihhihihihihihihiihihihihihihihihihihihihiihihiihihihihihihihihihihiihihihihiihihihi

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

Once upon a cross

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...