how many Pikachu's can you get in a mini? 14.

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

whats small and tickles? pubic lice

A Sloth runs...

A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

Why was the little boy screaming? He was going down a steep drop on a roller coaster.

What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

This is not a joke

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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