- Anti Joke

A black man named Lawrence was driving a car that wasn't his at 3 a.m. The car belonged to a drunk friend who asked Lawrence to be the designated driver.

How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

Roses are red violets are blue my d*** is bigger than you.

Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

Whats worse than being a 40 year old virgin? Being a 12 year old girl in Africa who gets raped everyday to feed her family.

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

I need a good anti joke....

Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

A black man named Lawrence was driving a car that wasn't his at 3 a.m. The car belonged to a drunk friend who asked Lawrence to be the designated driver.

How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

Homosexuals are gay.

Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

Roses are red violets are blue my d*** is bigger than you.

Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

Spotto

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

brainfart

Whats worse than being a 40 year old virgin? Being a 12 year old girl in Africa who gets raped everyday to feed her family.

Water? I hardly know her.

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??