Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Omg its that superman nope chuck testa

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Got no dick? Then you're probably a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Toaster

thumb_up thumb_down -11

? I hate niiggers ?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops