Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

whats water and frozen? an ice cube

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Nick!" Because he knows him and is not racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -33

poop

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What is the saddest episode on tv ever? The live broadcast of the World Trade Center being destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +54

how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

thumb_up thumb_down +50

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Halo < COD

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Ms. Smoot's class

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops