69

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Canadian man, American man and French man all go to a wive swapping party. The Canadian gets the American's wife, the American gets the French wife, and the Frenchman dies of a brain aneurism and the Canadian wife is very disappointed in her night.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

thumb_up thumb_down -11

so a kangaroo a piece of cake and a whale are all doing... ...nothing they would not hang out together

thumb_up thumb_down -11

3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

They decide to exchange heads. Barbie squeezes the small opening under her chin over Ken's bulging neck socket. His wide jaw line jostles atop his girlfriend's body, loosely, like one of those novelty dogs destined to gaze from the back windows of cars. The two dolls chase each other around the orange Country Camper unsure what they'll do when they're within touching distance. Ken wants to feel Barbie's toes between his lips, take off one of her legs and force his whole arm inside her. With only the vaguest suggestion of genitals, all the alluring qualities they possess as fashion dolls, up until now, have done neither of them much good. But suddenly Barbie is excited looking at her own body under the weight of Ken's face. He is part circus freak, part thwarted hermaphrodite. And she is imagining she is somebody else—maybe somebody middle class and ordinary, maybe another teenage model being caught in a scandal. The night had begun with Barbie getting angry at finding Ken's blow up doll, folded and stuffed under the couch. He was defensive and ashamed, especially about not having the breath to inflate her. But after a round of pretend-tears, Barbie and Ken vowed to try to make their relationship work. With their good memories as sustaining as good food, they listened to late-night radio talk shows, one featuring Doctor Ruth. When all else fails, just hold each other, the small sex therapist crooned. Barbie and Ken, on cue, groped in the dark, their interchangeable skin glowing, the color of Band-Aids. Then, they let themselves go— Soon Barbie was begging Ken to try on her spandex miniskirt. She showed him how to pivot as though he was on a runway. Ken begged to tie Barbie onto his yellow surfboard and spin her on the kitchen table until she grew dizzy. Anything, anything, they both said to the other's requests, their mirrored desires bubbling from the most unlikely places.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man walks into a bar. It turns out he is a notorious serial killer and he procedes to violently murder everyone in the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What looks like a dick? A penis

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops