They decide to exchange heads. Barbie squeezes the small opening under her chin over Ken's bulging neck socket. His wide jaw line jostles atop his girlfriend's body, loosely, like one of those novelty dogs destined to gaze from the back windows of cars. The two dolls chase each other around the orange Country Camper unsure what they'll do when they're within touching distance. Ken wants to feel Barbie's toes between his lips, take off one of her legs and force his whole arm inside her. With only the vaguest suggestion of genitals, all the alluring qualities they possess as fashion dolls, up until now, have done neither of them much good. But suddenly Barbie is excited looking at her own body under the weight of Ken's face. He is part circus freak, part thwarted hermaphrodite. And she is imagining she is somebody else—maybe somebody middle class and ordinary, maybe another teenage model being caught in a scandal. The night had begun with Barbie getting angry at finding Ken's blow up doll, folded and stuffed under the couch. He was defensive and ashamed, especially about not having the breath to inflate her. But after a round of pretend-tears, Barbie and Ken vowed to try to make their relationship work. With their good memories as sustaining as good food, they listened to late-night radio talk shows, one featuring Doctor Ruth. When all else fails, just hold each other, the small sex therapist crooned. Barbie and Ken, on cue, groped in the dark, their interchangeable skin glowing, the color of Band-Aids. Then, they let themselves go— Soon Barbie was begging Ken to try on her spandex miniskirt. She showed him how to pivot as though he was on a runway. Ken begged to tie Barbie onto his yellow surfboard and spin her on the kitchen table until she grew dizzy. Anything, anything, they both said to the other's requests, their mirrored desires bubbling from the most unlikely places.

I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

roses are red, vilots are blue wan't you in my bed if you know what i mean ;)

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

What's the tallest building in the world? A library cause it has so many stories get it haha.

Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

A black man hailed a taxi cab. He got in, and the taxi drove him to his destination for an appropriate fee.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

A wealthy businessman gets into an elevator with a poor, ragged janitor. They take the elevator up 19 floors. As the businessman leaves the elevator, he turns to the janitor and says, "Good day to you, sir."

Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

A blonde, brunette and a redhead are taken captive by a native tribe. They didn't survive the encounter.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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