Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

kiss me?

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

Knock knock Who's there? Osama Bin Laden

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...