What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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Yo momma so stupid that she went to get a college degree from a community college and along with her education now has a greater opportunity to earn money with that knowledge.

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What abou three times

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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