How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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No entiendo PORQUE cada día amanezco

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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a horse walks into a barn

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i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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