One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

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Hummer.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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ruddell and dodds anal

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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