An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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