why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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