Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? the pigment in their skin.

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops