So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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