Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

Oh, go away

Take part of what?

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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