roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

Matthew Baker

Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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