A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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