Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

You having friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

homosexual rights to marriage

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

You dropped something.... Yo lip

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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