What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. YO YO YO I F U C K YOU ALL!

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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