Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Cripples are lame.

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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