haha

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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