Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

What's big and messy? A big mess

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

If you just read this, You're dead.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

yo momma so fat that she needs to lose weight

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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