Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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Poop

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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