A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down -31

If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what did the orange say to the apple? hi

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops