Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Barack Obama.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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