HOLY COW!

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How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

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HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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Knock knock. Who's there? Three months to live. Three months to live who? The C-Scan showed a massive, inoperable tumor in your brain that's been developing for years. You have only three months to live.

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Denard Robinson

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Why was the black man fired from the bakery? He didn't work hard and was repeatedly absent

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kk

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Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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yo momma so fat that she needs to lose weight

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Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops