Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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